How can I rescue a bad meeting?

[Monirul Islam]

They never seem to start badly; everyone bounds into the room excitable and ready to share, but things can quickly take a nosedive. In my experience, meetings become frustrating when people come unprepared. I take that as a total disrespect of everyone's time. They should be for pitches, catchups or brainstorming and packed into a finite time. When someone arrives unprepared, they often get shamed by other team members. It is best just to admit defeat. Whether you are the unprepared culprit, the finger pointer or an observer, say: "OK guys, it seems we don't have the correct information at hand, so let's cancel today, set a new date and time, and here is what we expect at the next meeting." Otherwise it becomes a slow and painful hanging and it's embarrassing for everyone.


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Sometimes, the power trips are completely unwarranted and simply just an oppressor asserting their dominance. One of the lasting tips I picked up from Never Split The Difference, a brilliant book about the art of negotiation, was to act as an observer rather than the opposition. If someone is talking over others, repeating what people are saying or shutting ideas down, act as an outsider, starting with: "It seems as though..." So, for example, "It seems as though you don't see a need for this in your department." Say no more. Don't keep going in an accusatory tone. They usually go into defensive mode and, once they realise how ludicrous they are being, you can start on a level playing field. I also use this technique when someone is trying to talk down to me.

Meetings shouldn't be a roasting. Treat failures as mere experiments to learn from and, above all, keep moving forward. Always ask, well, what do we do now?

Source: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/apr/23/how-can-i-rescue-a-bad-meeting