Develop your Emotional Intelligence

[Badshah Mamun]

Develop your Emotional Intelligence

Do you want to be more effective at inspiring, motivating and leading your team? Are you constantly frustrated by people management issues? Do you want to enhance your networking and relationship management skills?

Do you want to be more effective at inspiring, motivating and leading your team?
Are you constantly frustrated by people management issues?
Do you want to enhance your networking and relationship management skills?

If your answer to any of these questions is yes, then the solution lies in the realm of your Emotional Intelligence. Emotional Intelligence (EI) is defined as the ability to recognise our own feelings and those of others for the purposes of motivating ourselves, for effectively managing our emotions and enhancing our relationships. Or to put it more simply, emotional intelligence is being intelligent about emotions.

Emotional Intelligence is increasingly relevant to organisations because the EI principles provide a new way to understand and assess people?s behaviours, management and leadership styles, attitudes, interpersonal skills, and potential. Success requires more than IQ and research has shown that the difference between average and outstanding performers is down to the latter?s higher levels of EI.

The four components of Emotional Intelligence are:

Self Awareness
Self Management
Social Awareness
Relationship Management

Self awareness means having a deep understanding of your own emotions, as well as your strengths, limitations, values and motives. Self aware business people know not only where they are headed, but why they are heading there. By increasing self awareness and being more aware of your emotions, you are in a better position to manage those emotions more effectively (self management).

Or put another way, how can you ever hope to manage, lead or influence others if you are unable to manage, lead or influence yourself? Increased self awareness also leads to increased social awareness or empathy. In other words the more attuned we are to ourselves the more attuned we can be with others. Self awareness, self management and social awareness combine in relationship management.

Fostering team work, motivating and influencing staff, resolving conflicts, managing change and networking are the competencies that are included in the term relationship management. Irrespective of your business, these are key skills in any management or team leadership role. Are some people just born with higher levels of Emotional Intelligence? Or do you acquire greater emotional intelligence as a result of life experience? The answer is both. Like any skill or talent, EI can be viewed like a muscle, the more it is flexed the stronger it will become.

5 Steps To Developing EI

1. Motivation
Firstly, you must have a compelling desire to change and develop. You have to believe that the positive benefits of enhancing your EI competencies outweigh the positive bi-products of your current behaviour.. Otherwise you will not have the level of motivation required to make a lasting change.

2. Practice
Recognise that the most effective way to develop EI is through action, practice and feedback. EI cannot be developed by attending a seminar or buying a ?how to? manual. The reason for this is that Emotional Intelligence is largely born in the neurotransmitters of the brain?s limbic system, which governs feelings, impulses and drives. Research indicates that the limbic system learns best through motivation, feedback and practice. Most training courses and books are aimed at the brain?s neocortex which learns through logic and association. For example, if you want to develop your listening skills, (an essential part of developing empathy and communication skills), reading a book on the topic will be of limited benefit. You simply have to practice active listening, that is, not thinking about how you are going to respond whilst the other person is still talking.

3. Change bad habits
Thirdly, be willing to ?undo? some current attitudes and behaviours. Recognise that they may have served you well in the past, but are perhaps no longer effective. These behavioural habits can be built up over many years. For example, you may have the habit of interrupting others when they are speaking, which is something that would have to be ?unlearned? if you want to be more effective at fostering empathy.

4. Do what is best for you
The desired behavioural changes must be congruent with your values (what?s important to you), your beliefs, and your blueprint for your future career.

5. Create action plan
Develop an action plan that includes support and feedback structures. It can also be useful to have a way of measuring or tracking changes. For example, undertake an EQ test to get an assessment of your emotional intelligence. Or of more practical benefit are structured forms of feedback, like 360 performance appraisals.

Studies both here and in the US have shown that when other factors are equal (IQ, knowledge, skills, experience), Emotional Intelligence is the difference that makes the difference between average and outstanding performers. Is it an area that could make all the difference for you?

Source: http://www.recruitireland.com/careercentre/careeradvice/Develop-your-Emotional-Intelli/4716